i surveyed well
I got this survey I’m not supposed to talk about until it goes “hard” (it’s still “soft” right now, so SHHH). I think it turned kind of funny after it started figuring out my lifestyle. Here are a few choice bits with my answers in bold:
* Do you floss regularly?
Yes No* Have you shopped at Wal-mart in the past month?
Yes No* Do you use a cell phone?
Yes, [are you kidding me?] No* Do you believe in UFOs?
Yes, [are you kidding me?] No* On a typical day, do you eat breakfast?
Yes [ even though I wanted to put “just coffee” I’m not that kind of strongman anymore ]
No
Just coffee* How many do you have?
Tattoos 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 or more N/A
Piercings 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 or more N/A [I would’ve felt better if ‘0′ was an answer]* You drink
never, sometimes, all the time* You drink whisk(e)y
Yes [thank you for giving me the choice of whiskey spellings!] No
Then the darn thing got all crazy and bitchy and specific about how much and what brands of other boozes I drink regularly. I think, after this morning having taken a physical with Dr. Tom, I’m a little hypersensitive or something.
Isn’t it funny though? Do you floss, do you shop at wal-mart, do you have a cell phone, do you believe in UFOs?
Like, if I’m a non-flossing wal-mart shopper without a cellphone who believes in UFOs, would you still ask me the breakfast question? What if I had flossed regularly? Would they still have asked me about all the booze? Does the choice of whisk(e)y spelling hinge on the wal-mart shopping question?
